• Sweden's news in English
 

Ten sure-fire ways to bug your Swedish friends

Published: 27 Feb 2013 15:31 GMT+01:00

There are endless tips and techniques for how to blend in with the Swedish culture and the Swedes themselves.

Learn the language, eat the meatballs, read the Stieg Larsson trilogy, pretend to care when the Swedish Academy announces the Nobel literature prize winner, feign indignation at Princess Madeleine preferring Manhattan to Gamla Stan.

While this integration can be tricky at times, (especially as the contents of meatballs is becoming more and more mysterious), we found that distancing yourselves from the Swedes is, well, rather easy.

IN PICTURES: Top ten ways to bug your Swedish friends

We've taken a look at a few of the things that Swedes hold most dear, and looked into how you can use it to your advantage (or disadvantage) by using it against whichever Swede it is you're planning to bug.

But why would you want to bug a Swede, anyway? Good question. But if you've read this far, it's a safe bet you're looking for some answers.

So, use this list as warning for how to avoid potentially crossing your friends in the north, or take notes on exactly how to irritate Sven from accounting.

Without further ado, here are top ten ways to bug your Swedish friends.

Patrick Reilly

Follow Patrick on Twitter here

Related links:

The Local (news@thelocal.se)

Your comments about this article

17:03 February 27, 2013 by Rishonim
# 11, pretend you are down and under and ask to borrow 500KR.
17:43 February 27, 2013 by salalah
# 12 : Have nicer clothes than the "natives" at work and tell them about your exotic vacation
18:27 February 27, 2013 by abir
I was invited to watch Melodifestivalen with a family once. I got a text ahead that told me not to say what I think of Melodifestivalen because it will hurt the feelings of certain people present... True story.
19:26 February 27, 2013 by Rishonim
# 14, when out with them, instead of going Dutch, you pay for the whole check
20:27 February 27, 2013 by HelmiVainikka
"You are of course free to practice whatever faith you want but just don't go on about it"

Oh the irony...
22:23 February 27, 2013 by kalbininkas
# 15. Being foreign. "Swedish friends"? What is that?
00:55 February 28, 2013 by Phillynilly
Support Norway in the hockey....
10:19 February 28, 2013 by Chuck_Norris
# 16 Start a conversation.
11:56 February 28, 2013 by Rishonim
# 17 Tell em you occasionally smoke pot
12:24 February 28, 2013 by ulster1690
# 18 Ask questions on Sweden's role during WW2.
12:42 February 28, 2013 by Rishonim
# 19 Ask why they use so much heavy cream in every meal ;-)
23:44 March 1, 2013 by theobserver
Once I invited a Swede at home, cooked him dinner, offered him wine, entertained him, made him feel welcome.

He never spoke to me again.

Another Swede told me that the reason is I was too hospitable and made him feel uncomfortable.

Even when you have the best intentions, Swedes are annoyed.

You know what? **** you weirdos! Get a life and see how *every* other civilised nation lives.
01:51 March 4, 2013 by Eric1
#20 Do you take your warm beer (horse pee) with your horse meatballs. Love you!
15:31 March 4, 2013 by rohermoker
If you want to offend an Americian/Swede, look then directly and ask "So how much did you really pay for that Volvo?"
19:14 March 13, 2013 by bcn86
that's all you got? tell them sweden's hockey is borring and how can they consider this offence to my eyes hockey, when they don't even fight. then go up on a table and make all this machist coments about women that you can and when you are done say: ...and no one has the balls to say anything, because swedes have no balls!
13:17 March 14, 2013 by exp
Why would you want to offend the Swedes? They´re nice people. @bcn86: Maybe you moved to the wrong continent (or century?) if you think sexist slurs about women are funny...
12:35 March 22, 2013 by janeway
10. People will shake their heads and tell you to have a cup of coffee.

9. Someone will politely remind you that you're not in Switzerland.

8. You will be told you're a neanderthal.

7. Most people will invite you in, ask if you want some coffee and then get to know you.

6. Not everyone watches this show!

5. If you jump the queue in a rude fashion, you will have the choice of returning to the end of the line or have an instant face remodelling. That is, if I'm present.

4. Not everyone watches this show!

3. Tea is not as uncommon as ut was 20 years ago. Lot's of people drink tea and have plenty of fresh and different teas at home.

2. Not everyone watches this show!

1. See number 5.
Today's headlines
Armed robbers attack Stockholm money truck
Police investigating a previous raid in 2013. Photo: TT

Armed robbers attack Stockholm money truck

Police in the Swedish capital are investigating a raid on a van transporting cash in the city, with at least two robbers suspected to have made off with a bag of money. READ  

Swedes among least likely to die from cold
A woman stuck in snow in Malmö during the winter. Photo: TT

Swedes among least likely to die from cold

Cold weather kills 20 times more people as hot weather, according to a new global study, but despite Sweden's harsh climate its inhabitants are less likely to die in chilly temperatures than Brits, Spaniards or Italians. READ  

'It's good that Swedish defence is quick to react'
Swedish PM Stefan Löfven speaking to reporters on Friday. Photo: Wiktor Nummelin/TT

'It's good that Swedish defence is quick to react'

Sweden's Prime Minister Stefan Löfven has praised the Swedish Air Force after two Jas Gripen aircraft warned off a pair of Russian fighter jets that strayed close to Swedish airspace this week. READ  

Frozen berry sales up despite deadly sickness
Raspberries are a popular snack in Sweden. Photo: TT

Frozen berry sales up despite deadly sickness

UPDATED: Sales of frozen berries are rising at one of Sweden's biggest supermarket chains, despite the fruits causing a deadly bug outbreak at an elderly care home, which has led to other EU nations reviewing their safety guidelines. READ  

Interview
'Serious blow' to EU if UK leaves says minister
Sweden's foreign minister Margot Wallström. Photo: Janerik Henriksson/TT

'Serious blow' to EU if UK leaves says minister

Two months after one of Sweden's biggest diplomatic disputes in decades, foreign minister Margot Wallström is ready to look to the future. In an exclusive interview with The Local, she discusses Sweden's strong stance on the Mediterranean migrant crisis and why she wants the UK to remain in the EU. READ  

Refugees to Sweden left in six-month limbo
Sweden's migration officers face a huge workload. Photo: Maja Suslin/TT

Refugees to Sweden left in six-month limbo

UPDATED: Asylum seekers arriving in Sweden are now likely to face a wait of up to six-months before they can have their cases heard, as migration officers struggle to cope with the workload. READ  

Sweden's Eurovision star Måns through to final
Sweden's Måns Zelmerlöw is through to the Eurovision 2015 final. Photo: Jessica Gow/TT

Sweden's Eurovision star Måns through to final

Sweden's Eurovision hope, Måns Zelmerlöw, sailed through with his track 'Heroes' in a semi-final that was mostly lined with rock goth-inspired ballads. But will he nail his gnome fist bump in time for Saturday's final? READ  

The Local Recipes
How to make crispy Swedish asparagus
Crispy baked asparagus. Photo: John Duxbury

How to make crispy Swedish asparagus

Asparagus season is upon us. Swedes love this green vegetable, so what better way to celebrate than with some crispy asparagus baked with traditional Swedish cheese. Food writer John Duxbury shares his recipe with The Local. READ  

Russian bombers caught close to Swedish island
A Jas Gripen plane snapped in 2013. Photo: TT

Russian bombers caught close to Swedish island

Two Swedish Jas Gripen aircraft warned off a pair of Russian fighter jets that were flying close to the southern Swedish island of Öland on Thursday. READ  

Swedish 'whore' murder plotter faces charges
Police officers in Kalmar in 2013. Photo: TT

Swedish 'whore' murder plotter faces charges

A 20-year-old man alleged to have written notes about his plans to kill a "whore", an "unfriendly" person and an "immigrant child" has been charged with three counts of conspiring to murder in a gruesome case that is gripping the Swedish media. READ  

RECEIVE OUR NEWSLETTER AND ALERTS
National
How two million Swedes are designing a 'house of clicks'
National
What's on in Sweden this week
Sponsored Article
Kristin Amparo: 'Swedes are afraid to be proud'
National
Five facts you need to know about Sweden's Eurovision entry
Bupa
Sponsored Article
Healthcare: Nine questions every expat should ask
Blog updates

22 May

Editor’s blog, May 22nd (The Local Sweden) »

"Greetings from Stockholm, The hot topic in Europe this week is whether or not the UK will..." READ »

 

8 May

 (Joel Sherwood) »

"Daycare called today. They ordered me to drop all activities and come pick up my child...." READ »

 
 
 
Sponsored Article
What it's like to be a student in Malmö
National
Why do one in three Swedes want to join Nato?
Sponsored Article
'No one tells expats about unemployment benefits'
Features
What to do in Stockholm this summer
Sponsored Article
Why expat women are choosing Swedish natural birth control
Gallery
People-watching: May 20th
National
How Sweden and Saudi Arabia got back on speaking term after row
Gallery
Property of the week: Västra hamnen, Malmö
Sponsored Article
'There is no such thing as Swedish values'
National
Why is support for the Sweden Democrats at a record high?
Sponsored Article
ConnectSweden: Examining Sweden's place in the world
Gallery
People-watching: May 15th - 17th
National
VIDEO: Swedish man's roar scares off charging bear
National
'Gang conflict' linked to latest Gothenburg attack
National
RECIPE: How to make Panna cotta with cloudberry jam
Sponsored Article
'Educated immigrants get stuck in limbo in Sweden'
Gallery
IN PICTURES: Your May sun snaps
National
Sweden backs migrant sharing plan
National
Swedish boozing on the rise
National
Why Sweden's deputy PM was forced to apologize for Auschwitz analogy
National
End of the road for Julian Assange's arrest appeal?
Features
Booked to go to one of Sweden's sizzling music festivals yet?
National
Is Avicii set to play at Sweden's royal wedding?
National
Meet the Swedish boy who used to be a girl
Sponsored Article
How to change the world: Malmö to Mogadishu
Gallery
IN PICTURES: Princess Estelle through the years
National
Why is obesity ballooning in Sweden?
National
VIDEO: The bizarre Swedish nurses song that's gone viral
National
Ecuador stray dog Arthur in Swedish charity race
National
UK expert: 'Sweden's current military state is alarming'
National
Elfdalian: a real language spoken in central Sweden in 2015
National
Is King's love for house tracks behind new military music?
Gallery
Property of the week: Hjortnäs, Leksand
National
Sex-crazed grouse terrorizes Swedes
National
IN PICTURES: Sweden's King Carl XVI turns 69
National
Dolphins spotted in Baltic
Gallery
People-watching: May 1st-3rd
Sponsored Article
'Never waste a good crisis'
National
Road trippers flock to 'The Bridge'
National
Why are Swedish supermarkets banning paracetamol pills?
Gallery
People watching: April 29th
National
"In many ways Swedes and Americans are kindred spirits"
Politics
Did you know four Swedish party leaders are women?
National
Swedish rescue team stuck on way to Nepal quake zone
National
Why Sweden's brown bear population is in danger
National
TIMELINE: Julian Assange sex allegations in Sweden
Gallery
Property of the week: Forshaga
National
Here's how a Swede became the world's boxing champion
Swedish Hasbeens
Sponsored Article
Is the world wrong to connect Sweden with sex?
Sponsored Article
'Impossible' to run Skanska without Bromma Airport
Sponsored Article
Want to study in Sweden? Read why Stockholm is the best choice
Sponsored Article
'Sweden must embrace openness and diversity'
Latest news from The Local in Austria

More news from Austria at thelocal.at

Latest news from The Local in Switzerland

More news from Switzerland at thelocal.ch

Latest news from The Local in Germany

More news from Germany at thelocal.de

Latest news from The Local in Denmark

More news from Denmark at thelocal.dk

Latest news from The Local in Spain

More news from Spain at thelocal.es

Latest news from The Local in France

More news from France at thelocal.fr

Latest news from The Local in Italy

More news from Italy at thelocal.it

Latest news from The Local in Norway

More news from Norway at thelocal.no

3,376
jobs available
PSD Media
PSD Media is marketing company that offers innovative solutions for online retailers. We provide modern solutions that help increase traffic and raise conversion. Visit our site at:
psdmedia.se