Published: 26 Nov 10 13:09 CET | Print version
Online: http://www.thelocal.se/30450/20101126/
While there are certainly benefits to positive thinking, Swedish feminist Jenny Sonesson argues that women might not have the right to vote today if suffragettes had been satisfied writing gratitude diaries.
External link: Women's Association of the Liberal Party (in Swedish) »
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I hear you (zircon) say that women in your home should put their female issues second, and strive to look good. Plus some incoherent ramblings.
Be happy with what you got, and unhappy with what you do not. Life rose from a will to improve ones position. The species that were content were defeated by the species that weren't. I think that a person is only happy when they experience transcendance, going from A to B where B is better than A. Rising that gradient is the very goal, not the checkpoints themselves. Because once you get to B you rejoice for a while and then proceed to C which is better than B. Deny people this and they get depressed.
Thus, it is very sound and proper for both women and men to look at their place in life and see what can be improved. And women have a lot to get improved compared to men. Not saying that men live in paradise either.
Paradise would actually suck when I think of it, as it is a stagnant state. At least as it is imagined what with clouds and harps and whatever.
If keeping a diary helps any particular person with their issues, man or woman, then good for them.
Jenny clearly fears the future of feminism is threatened by women who are so grateful for what they, they will be less likely to ask for more. I think women are much better than that Jenny. Don't be so condescending. And stop writing nonsense about "holy wrath". Deal with people as they are (grateful for some things, and wrathful about other things), not how you want them to be.
Perhaps a bit less "holy wrath" in your own life, and a bit more time thinking about the good things might help you too. You can't be angry all the time, take a day off.
Good luck with those future victories.
What was the difference between Martin Luther King Jr and Malcom X? One channeled their frustration with injustice in a positive way that appealed to people's better natures, and the other became hateful.
Also understand that while someone like MLK Jr can build bridges and someone like Malcom X can divide, while there are feminists that have built bridges and others that have divided people... ie, Gloria Steinem.
Lets also not forget all the men who fought for women's suffrage, and all the women who were against it. For example, in the US, President Wilson was supportive, while his wife was against it. For his wife, it was a generational thing -- a lot of older women were happy with traditions. Don't make this into some grandiose narrative about war between the sexes. Most people aren't irrational, and if you're right about your beliefs you should be able to persuade them. At the same time, consider that you may be wrong and be persuaded yourself.
Does Jenny think Mary, Martin and Lech spent all their time roaring at the world? They spent their fair of time, "sitting behind ashrams walls and meditating" too, and might even have written an early version of a gratitude diary, every now and then, as well. In Jenny's eyes, her heroic revolutionaries have ascended to Godlike status, while she warns us mere mortals against human weaknesses such as "gratitude".
No thanks Jenny, I'll stick with being a human being, and be grateful whenever I want to be. Don't be so impertinent; it's enough to put someone off feminism if this is how they behave.
you, and be grateful for your paycheck that is 80% of what your male equivalent is earning, because in other countries it would have only been 50%. gratitude is indeed and always has been a part of the subjugation of women.
we shouldn't endure, we should fight.
robinhood: have you ever heard the term "the personal is political"?. this whole new wave of gratitude, positive thinking and self help products is aimed precisely at eliminating this idea. we are told that our personal is personal, and
anything that is wrong with our lives is in our hands. it sounds inspiring and positive, the notion that we can take control over our lives, but the truth is that our control is very limited, and if we look too much into ourselves, we'll forget to look at our society and our government and the influence and responsibility they have on how our lives look.
to quote Carol Hanisch again, "Understanding that our oppressive situations were not our own fault — were not, in the parlance of the time, "all in our head" — gave us a lot more courage as well as a more solid, real foundation on which to fight for liberation."
redfish: most people are irrational, and we are all, each of us to a different extent, products of our society and culture. there are men and women on both sides of the gender struggle, although let's not pretend to be naive. walk into a university classroom where a feminism related course is being held, and you'll find maybe 4 men within the 60 women listening to the lecture. it's not such a far-fetched idea, that the social group who's on top, the one with the most power, shows little to no interest in changing this power distribution.
kevin harris: i don't think jenny thinks you should be walking around angry all day long and never be grateful, no. i really can't see how that was understood from the text.
in fact, to all of you, i don't understand why all your comments involve personal attacks at Jenny Sonesson. is it really THAT terrifying and enraging when a woman talks about feminism?
This piece isn't about feminism at all; it's a demeaning, bullying Orwellian lecture about the dangers of gratitude. I don't give a rat's arse if the author is a feminist or not. Who's she to tell me which emotions I should prefer at any given time.
Optimism, gratitude - "it is a feminist challenge to respond to it." Are there any other positive emotions I need to address to avoid any further feminist challenges? I go through several dozen other emotions a day, I wouldn't want to upset anybody with these outrageous thoughtcrimes.
Any person who doesn't like being told what to think, and what not to think, would do well to avoid Jenny Sonesson and re-read George Orwell's 1984 instead.
i fail to find a place in the article where jenny tells the readers how or when to think. she's writing about a phenomena, the "the secret" phenomena, and the way it can harm the feminist movement.
as i wrote before, there's a saying that stands as one of the base points of the
feminist movement which is "the personal is political". put in the context of the 60's, that saying basically means "me being beat up by my husband, raped in the street, not being able to voice my opinion - are not personal problems that should be dealt with on a personal level, they are POLITICAL and SOCIAL problems and should be dealt with as so".
i wasn't beat up because i was a bad wife, but because i live in a society where it's okay to slap your wife.
i wasn't raped because i dared walk in the street after dark by myself, i was raped because i live in a society where rape is punished by 6 months in prison and thus isn't considered a major offense.
you get the point..
this new wave of books, programs and approaches like "the secret", are saying the exact opposite - they are saying that the personal is personal. they promote the notion that if i don't want to be raped i should think positive, or worse, not go out by myself at night.
this should anger not only feminists, but anyone who suffers the injustices of society, because it is basically telling them that it's their fault, and theirs to deal with - with positive thinking and gratitude for what isn't shitty in their lives!
jenny isn't telling anyone how to handle their emotions, she's pointing out that there is a new phenomena, a new wave of thinking, that is being pushed on us from every direction, and that this way of thinking can be numbing. and she's right!
Who said its the women who are right and the men who are wrong? Many women today also believe that we live in a post-feminist world and we need to move on to broader issues, not ignoring womens rights but also involving mens rights, like in cases when they can be falsely accused of rape. You may disagree with that POV, but please make your arguments, and don't talk with some self-righteous sense of superiority.
And who said the older generation of women in the 19th century opposed to suffrage were somehow irrational and the newer generation were rational? The demand for women's suffrage was more about the times changing than anything. In the 18th century most men couldn't vote either, because the vote was restricted to property holders, and by the 19th century more and more women were becoming involved in urban life and becoming independent from men. The great demand for womens rights and suffrage was in fact precipitated by the issue of widowed women who no longer had a husband and no longer had any political or legal representation.
The problem with how the movement towards womens rights is presented in many classes is that its depicted as some great ideological gender struggle, where the righteous and rational people who supported suffrage were pitted against the wicked and irrational people who were against it and an evil, domineering patriarchal society. But in fact, the story was much, much less Manichean than that. Society was changing, and the laws have to adjust to a changing society. Many of the women who were against it were reactionary, and their reaction was instinctively against it because a lot of the women who were for it, by the end of the 19th century were also into social revolutionary politics on a lot of other fronts. Remember, its the Suffragettes who eventually brought us Prohibition.
"i fail to find a place in the article where jenny tells the readers how or when to think."
Jenny said:
"Revolutionaries such as Mary Wollstonecraft, Martin Luther King and Lech Walesa were not grateful." (What rubbish).
"Democracy fighters who I met in Cuba, in Belarus and in Somalia are not grateful. And we should be happy for it."
"…it's critical thinking and anger at injustice that brought the world forward and increased humanity's collective happiness."
"…We cannot achieve things by just sitting behind ashrams walls and meditating."
"This optimistic philosophy has gained particular support among women and it is a feminist challenge to respond to it."
"Holy wrath is a force that can bring the world's happiness forward, rather than gratitude."
I think you totally misread my comment or completely misunderstood it. I see the value of gratitude for both men and women. Just because you are grateful for the good things in your life, doesn't make subservient, unable to cope with life, or oblivious to reality.
I have lupus, which is a totally sucky disease. I hate it. Will I ever go around being grateful that I have lupus? No. But I am grateful for the lessons I have learned. I have learned not to take good health for granted. I've learned to grab life by the horns and live. When I feel good, I rejoice in it and enjoy every single moment of it. I am grateful for everyday that I am alive to spend time with my family, enjoying the many pleasures of life, and doing the things I enjoy. I've learned lessons from having lupus. But that doesn't mean that I just take a blind stance to it. No, I am active in helping raise money for research. I work hard to raise awareness for this disease.
Having gratitude for your life can give you the courage to push forward out of hard things. You can be grateful for a good job, but you can also work hard to get a salary raise. You can be grateful for the sacrifices of all the women and men who did so much to improve the station of women. Then, you can press forward in the fight to further improve lives of women.
Now, if you feel differently, that's fine. We all have different feelings about life. And we tackle issues in different ways. You don't have to think the same way I do, but you don't have to diss my philosophy either. Those who have a philosophy of gratitude are not ostriches sticking their heads in the sand. They choose to their lives in a deliberate way. It may not be your way, but that doesn't make it wrong or stupid.
as long as women worldwide are not granted equal rights to those of men in their societies, we do not live in a post-feminist world. there is NOT ONE country in the world where women earn an equal pay to men, or receive an equal representation in power positions.
http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2010/11/13/national-gender-inequality-in-cross-cultural-perspective/
the feminist movement is a complex, broad movement encompassing many points of view and social classes, and in it's essence is multi-cultural and self
reflective. of course there have been and still are branches who take an elitist approach, but that is a small, criticized part within the movement. try browsing
this website http://feministing.com/ and let me know if you find any elitism, any
mocking. or rather, will you get a picture of a community very aware of it's times, aware of the political atmosphere in the world, and concerned with many other inequality and injustice issues that are not directly regarding women.
as for men being falsely accused of rape, did you know that of all reported
cases of rape, 2% are false allegations? i can email you the research if you'd
like.
dear kevin harris,
as i said before, making this into a discussion on whether or not jenny sonesson is plotting to mind control us all, is SO unrelated that i'm going to leave it right now. it's total nit-picking on semantics in an attempt to avoid the actual interesting subject of her article, over which i am more than happy to debate.
swedemum,
gratitude, positive thinking, and hopefulness are important elements of our mental health, and i believe nor i, nor jenny, claimed otherwise.
i quote her article "Yes, it's certainly useful to think of positively instead of
burying oneself in grievances. This is shown by the success of cognitive
psychology. And yes, it can give spiritual harmony and inspire good actions."
i never wrote that being positive, happy and grateful is stupid, did i?
i believe that it's necessary to hold a good stance anywhere in the middle between content and discontent, as both complete optimism and complete pessimism are numbing. and i think you feel the same way, as you describe your fight against lupus, with a positive mindset.
i don't know if you've read "the secret" and others like it (which is what jenny is writing about). it's a completely different story. this multi-million industry of telling happiness has taken the wisdoms of psychology, religion and culture,
and compressed them all into one socially numbing approach. these books tell you that you're to blame for all your sorrows, and that you should battle these sorrows with positive thinking and gratefulness, rather than, lets say, protest against unfair government policies. and that, is what jenny is trying to bring across.