February 15, 2012
Raised in Boston, remade in Sweden
So who says Swedes are cold, unfriendly and unkind? Well, you’re wrong if you do.
I know that for those who understand they’re not, I’m preaching to the choir. But for those of you screaming, “Hell yeah, I do,” I’ll never convince you otherwise…so the following little anecdote might be just another a feel-good story for the attentive choir.
Christmas feel-good stories are always in season, so bah humbug to the rest of you 
Bengt, a friend in a remote suburb of Stockholm, was desperately looking for a Santa suit for his son. On Monday and Tuesday most schools will celebrate Lucia, a celebration of light during the dark days of December. Children dress up as little santas, gingerbread men and tiny Lucia characters.
He had tried all the usual places and everything was sold out. So he put out the call on Facebook. (He did get an offer from some American friends to lend him one but the commute was a bit of a hassle.)
In the end, by phone, Bengt found ONE suit in the right size in a shop even further away from Stockholm. So he asked the salesman if he could put the suit on hold. The man offered to help out one (maybe several) better.
He BOUGHT the suit with his own money and drove it to Bengt’s house saying that it was on his way home anyway (although in truth it was a 20-minute detour.) Bengt gratefully both rounded up very generously but also threw in a bottle of glögg (seasonal, Swedish mulled wine) all the while thanking him.
The man tried hard to refuse the wine and after reluctantly accepting it parted saying “Thank YOU for letting me do you this act of kindness.”
So many think I’m crazy when insist that Swedes are kind and generous. But they are. They really are.
Yarn anarchists will never unravel any society, but they do put a bit of cozy into urban graffiti. Popularly known as yarn bombing it’s wrapped its way around pipes, poles and limbs of Stockholm.
Here’s today’s sighting on St. Eriksgatan taken by a good friend.
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Dressing up Stockholm is far from new. The most celebrated street art influences is to dress up Järnpojken, the Iron Boy. The first time I saw him in Gamla Stan (Old Town) he had on a little scarf like in this picture.
He’s also known at “the boy who is looking at the moon” and is said to be Stockholm’s smallest statue. A work by the artist Liss Eriksson, it was erected in 1967.
Unfortunately there is still much of the traditional tag graffiti littering Stockholm, but perhaps a soft approach to street art can positively influence the taggers.
I wonder if these Swedish grannies in this story would ever yarn bomb a drainpipe. At least some penguins are going to be styling some Swedish design.
The Swedish Skycat aerobatic team are currently performing in China. They are getting a fair amount of attention. Firstly, in addition to the pilot, there are two Swedish women dressed in catsuits who wing walk while a biplane does loops and barrel rolls.
I don’t think there’s a need for a secondly (Did I mentions that they are young female Swedes dressed up in catsuits walking on the wings of an airplane? In flight. Looping and rolling?)
Chinese TV interviewed the two Swedish wingwalkers link to CCTV footage. (The interview is in English, the rest, Chinese.)
I don’t know if it’s common camera handling or the cameraman just likes the up-and-down-the-body of the Swedish purty-cats.
You can follow their blog updates here. (though I understand they have some Internet availability issues…updates certainly to come soon.)
Aftonbladet published this piece on them (in Swedish.)
Go Hella and Elin
Personally, I love mushrooms but my Swedish husband hates them.
In his own words, “You can’t find a menu in Stockholm these days that aren’t contaminated by mushrooms”. He was out to dinner with his company last night at Rolf’s Kök and 2 of the 3 dishes had mushrooms in them. He’s a good sport and gets by picking them out. (Though he’s not really impressed that for a party of 8+ you have to preorder your menu and everyone has to eat the exact same dishes –another entry, another day.)
It’s also tough for the hubby as his family are mushroom fans. I am pretty sure my mother-in-law suffers from some sort of mushroom-picking disorder. Literally, she is out every day roaming the nearby forest and gathering basket-loads of mushrooms (mostly trattkantarell or funnel chanterelles in English.) She told me that today she only stopped when she physically couldn’t carry more. Her neighbors love her as she gives most of them away (she knows mushrooms are forbidden in her son’s home –not fair really.)
My own harvest (though dutifully turned over to my MIL)
This evening at a parent-teacher meeting, our 7-year old’s teacher filled us in on the latest project the kids have been working on. Yep, you guessed it…mushrooms. They designed them, drew them, used them for counting, learned about them and read stories about them.
The look the husband gave me was of despair as if being outnumbered, outgunned and defeated.
“It’s brainwashing” he muttered.
Perhaps it is. Swedes love their mushrooms (and no, not the funny ones;-)
Nine bucks. That’s what my first pint of beer cost me during the summer of 1992.
A popular CNN article, “What’s wrong with Stockholm“, spreading fast via social media, paints a wonderful view of Stockholm. According to its author the only downside was an expensive and pathetic martini.
It’s nice to read about a first experience account of this glorious city which includes generosity and hospitality by Stockholmers (fondly nicknamed The Viking and The Joker).
My first evening in Stockholm that June of 1992 also involved kind and welcoming Stockholmers. A group of them I met in Ivar Lo Park on the heights of Söder (while watching the balloons hover over
Riddarfjärden took me under their wings and invited me along to the Black and Brown
just down the hill.
The Black and Brown is still a lovely place for a pint (still around nine bucks, a bargain if you consider inflation). The US dollar was crap that summer (only 5.5kr/USD and later during my return in August it dropped to 5.0).
I nearly choked on the $9 price tag of that beer. But I was grateful they took credit cards.
That evening transpired into the first day of the rest of my life in Stockholm. CNN is right; life in Stockholm is pretty great.
When homosexual wedding greeting cards are unceremoniously displayed in mainstream shops we’ve shaken the “alternative lifestyle” label tagged on to gay marriage. At least in Sweden.
Same-sex marriages have been legal since May 1, 2009 and registered same-sex partnerships were recognized already from 1995.
I found these cards on display at one of my favorite stationery [chain] stores,
Ordning & Reda
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Now you have all options covered for your next wedding invitation needs.
Just don’t drive yourself nuts by converting the 30kr cost of the card (OK, if you have to, it’s just under $5.)
Oh, and if you’re attending a gay wedding, I highly recommend buying the Leatherman Multitool for the happy couple. Especially if it’s already on their gift registration list.
I think I get Swedes. Sort of. Kind of. Still working on it, really.
I’ve been at it for nearly 2 decades and the learning curve has been tumultuous, but any good ride has its ups and down. However, it can be a hit or miss for most “newbies” to Sweden. And if you read the pages of The Local, you’ll find there is often “someone” with their knickers in a twist about Swedes. This popular article on TL comes first to mind.
Now it’s quite true that striking up conversation with the random Swede on the street is not always forthcoming. Swedes are a little skittish and they (particularly 08ers aka Stockholmers) are molded from that normal “big city aloofness” you find in any big city which does make them hard to reach. But reachable they are. Warm and loving too. But yes, also, terse, stoic and reserved.
I’m gregarious. I talk up everyone and anyone and it took me a long while to realize that I’m pretty odd in Boston too. New Yorkers and other Americans regularly complain about us Bostonians being uptight and unapproachable. When I first heard it, I was shocked. Taking a look at it with open eyes I realized that there’s truth to it. Your average Bostonian won’t strike up random conversation, not the kind of polite conversation the people in the article are talking about. BUT, if YOU strike up conversation with a Bostonian and work at it by all the unwritten social/cultural rules of Bostonianism, you can be chatting away for hours.
Stockholmers are like Bostonians: tough nuts to crack (and Swedes have slightly tougher outer shells.) But inside that outer crust it’s all warm and gooey.
I feel sorry for the couple in the above article. They think that because they were brown Swedes didn’t want to interact with them. I’m brown (more so now after a sunny summer) but I chat up Swedes regularly with the fitting success one can ascribe to chatting to Stockholmers.
But maybe I “hear” Swedes better. So much communication among Swedes is non-verbal: a nod of the head, a crook in their smile, a twinkle in their eye.
As for the staring, I have heard people complain of this, but in all honesty I’ve never felt it myself (do Bostonians stare a lot?).
So take heart. If you want to speak to Swedes. Make the first, gentle move. Wait. And then listen…they’re talking to you.
Preggers, Up the Duff, Baking buns. Whichever colorful expression you fancy, Victoria, Crown Princess of Sweden, Duchess of Västergötland (my, that’s a mouthful to remember) will soon include “Mum”to her title.
The official announcementfrom the palace came on Wednesday and traditional and social media spread the news wildfire. I am sure loyal royalists are delighted by baby news (seeing as the last bit of Royal news was scandalous linking the King Grandpa to the criminal underground, sex parlors and brought speculation to his credibility.)
The baby-in-making is welcomed news since in that old-fashioned way, he/she assures the royal lineage. Baby bun will officially become 2nd in line to the Swedish throne after his/her mom.
But heirs to thrones tend to spark raised voices calling for a republic. Though I think, indifferent-to-the-monarchy Swedes, and even mildly motivated republicans are all closetly warmed by the creation of life and the prospects of baby photo ops.
The instigator inside me is hoping for a girl. It’s no secret that if the King had his way, his first-born son (second-born child) Prince Carl Philip, Duke of Värmland, (not quite as long as big sis’ name) would have remained Crown Prince. Calle was born Crown Prince and retained his title for 7 months until January 1, 1980 when Sweden adjusted its Act of Succession and snipped the bit of male preference primogeniture (first born heir-apparent status).
Good luck Vicky and Danny. We look forward to a bouncing baby come March 2012.
As left or liberal as Americans consider my political viewpoints, I tend to place right of center in Sweden on matters, especially on socio-political matters and even “quite right” fiscally.
In today’s SvD (one of Sweden’s daily newspapers) I read about a report that a case of “incitement of hate towards a populous group” (hets mot folkgrupp)against a humorous and satire-dripping song/performance was dismissed by the committee appointed to investigate the complaint. Apparently the song was performed at the über popular summer sizzling sing-along event at Skansen, Allsång. I don’t think that it’s merely coincidental that the performance took place during the Stockholm Pride Festival.
I had never heard the song, knew nothing of the case and was very curious since this particular law I find…well…hyper-sensitive and too restrictive. The basis of the law is to prevent active, intentional and even unintentional incitement of hate aimed at particular groups of people.
Now I don’t espouse or condone hate or inciting hate, but I don’t really subscribe to a notion that we should legislate against it if there’s no call to act upon that hate (like an incitement to violence.) I just can’t see making a very naturally human condition to be bigoted as something to criminalize. I mean, if I have an unfounded and inflammatory opinion about Blue People, I really should be able to express it provided it lacks a call to hurt Blue People.
So I watched the performance and listened to the text. It is absolutely hysterically funny and so obviously a satirical parody of bible-thumping Christian fundamentalists (probably inspired by the Westboro Baptist Church who once maintained a website called “God Hates Sweden”). The song’s text basically repeats that all of today’s woes, all wars, all problems…you name it, it’s all the fault of gays/homosexuals.
Here’s a link to the YouTube performance. Unfortunately, while the link says it’s subtitled in English, I haven’t seen where the subtitles are supposed to be.
Of course if you take the text literally, it would be deemed in breech of the law, but the committee quickly returned a judgement that it was not intended to be literally interpreted.
It’s good that the discrimination authority had a sense of humor. Not everything can be taken too seriously.
As diverse as Sweden is, there are a few societal norms that are distinctly Swedish. Understanding a handful of them will hopefully prepare you culturally before you relocate. When you're invited home to a Swede, you better be on time and take your shoes off, writes expat Lola Akinmade-Åkerström. Read more »
Sweden is a country where almost everyone can speak English. So why bother to learn Swedish? Edina Varnagy from Hungary managed with English for a whole year but then found that Swedish could open doors – to a job, a social life and greater understanding. Read more »
"The ice dripped in the winter sun. It was the first day when the light had been intense enough to cause dripping in the sunlight. To hear it was an extraordinary wakeup call. The cycle was happening again as it always does, always will (or so we think). I imagined that on my summer island, the bees..." READ »
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