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Trying to see the funny side of Sweden

Posts Tagged ‘throat’

A couple of days in the US

Sunday, September 12th, 2010

So, I’m back from the US, although, I should point out that as I live in Linköping, the US is the Universitetssjukhuset (University Hospital) where I underwent some major surgery. If you read this blog back in April, you may remember that I had some problems with my throat.

After several months of being prodded about and being cut open I am finally rid of the benign tumor that has been lurking in the back of my neck. Apparently it was the size of an egg, but the surgeon did not elaborate on whether it was quail, chicken or ostrich. My boyish good looks have been slashed by a Chelsea smile gone awry, a Frankenstinian scar that stretches down most of my neck. To be honest, I’m glad to be free of the growth and to be out of this particular relationship with Sweden’s health service, but mostly to be in good health!

Pain is only temporary and the scar will heal, but the most stressful element has been not knowing when the operation will be. I have avoided booking many gigs this autumn, in the knowledge that I’ll be out of action for a little while, but not knowing when that little while would be.  Anyway, I’m back and what hasn’t killed me has made me stronger, so I’m looking forward to an action packed autumn as I go full throttle, tumor free, to conquer Sweden’s world of entertainment!

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Locallers! Your vote needed!

Friday, June 18th, 2010

Well, good readers of The Local. I need your help. My 30 second film is in the final of a competition and I need to get some votes. The voting started about a week ago and I’ve only just found time to start getting people to vote… so I’m currently in the next to last position. (I’ve been in hospital with the throat, if that wins me any sympathy)

Anyway, if you’ve enjoyed my blog in the past (or even if you haven’t) and want to do me a favour, please do the following:


Click on the grey box at the top  which says ‘Se och rösta på finalbidragen!’

Then click the button next to my film – ‘La Nuit Americaine’ and then click ‘Rösta’ (vote)

That’s it. Simple

Cheers blogfans… normal blogging resumes soon!

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Angry like Otto Jr

Tuesday, May 4th, 2010

This last week I’ve been grumbling around Linköping like a bear with a sore head. Or more accurately a man with a sore throat, the pain of which has been augmented somewhat by the fact that somewhere along the line the doctor failed to pass my biopsy sample (large piece of throat flesh) to pathology, leaving me back at square one.

Like Norwegian Hip Hop hero, Otto Jr, I’ve got attitude. It’s a bit like being in London again where confrontation is cathartic, but unfortunately with the throat my powers of aggression are somewhat diminished. I was halfway through giving a bus driver a piece of my mind after he had cut me up on my bike, when I started coughing uncontrollably. It kind of took the edge off my rant.

Anyway, in the name of ‘entertainment’ I promised to pass on this World Cup video/song that comedian Anneli Heed sings on. It’s a satirical piece drawing on the infidelities of members of the England squad. Just in case you watch it and think ‘How did they get John Terry and Ashley Cole to agree to this?’ I have to warn you they have used lookielikies. The Svennis is very good (scandal circa 2002) and the Amy Winehouse is very good… although as far as I know, she has not been linked to any footballers…

Anneli sings beautifully, but I think the small rapping bloke with the short arms could learn a thing or two from Otto Jr.

Here it is: Ca$hbeatz ft. Anneli Heed

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Norrköping Proud

Sunday, April 25th, 2010

Friday night was the stand up event at Norrköping Pride which was all about spreading the love.

All three comedians went down very well and I did a nice job compering (even if I say so myself). The love was spread and laughs were had by the audience at the almost full venue. There were one or two very right on people in the audience who I enjoyed watching cringe at some of the less politically correct jokes – especially Robin Olsson’s hilarious routine about dating a deaf man. Most people were in hysterics, but I watched two ladies in kaftans making a silent stand for deaf rights.

We were each given a little thank you present afterwards – A handmade rainbow dishcloth, presumably to remind us of gender issues while we did the washing up. It won’t help me – I strongly believe housework is women’s work.

At around midnight, I decided to leave the other comedians to it as the sambucca started arriving in shot glasses. Driving and taking penicillin were accepted as half decent excuses for not staying and drinking. I went to get my car only to find that the car park shut the gates at 10pm. Ready to take on the full jobsworth bureaucracy of Norrköping parking department I phoned them to open the gates. When the security guy came I experienced something I never thought I would in Sweden. He let me off the 300 kronor fine for opening the gates.

Spread the love, Norrköping, spread the love.

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A matter of Pride

Thursday, April 22nd, 2010

Throat still bad and I’m not going to MC at tonight’s club at Café M. My friend Emil will take the reins and I may try and do five minutes of silent comedy – leaving the audience speechless or in stunned silence, no doubt.

Tomorrow, Friday, I have put together a show for Norrköpings Pride Festival with three gay comedians: Pernilla Hammargren, Robin Olsson and Per Robin Gustafsson. . Per Robin has been in the news lately for having  very public spat with Anna Anka… Oh the drama.. Read more on his blog.

The show starts at Trappan at 9pm on Friday if you are around NKPG

I’m just filled with a great sense of satisfaction that I am only 2 degrees (Per Robin, Anna Anka) of separation from having given Paul Anka a daily blowjob. Quite an achievement for a straight guy with a bad throat!

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Throat threat

Tuesday, April 20th, 2010

It should have been a simple week… one club gig and one gig organised for Norrköping Pride festival on the 23rd. But then it all went wrong… I went to see the doctor about a swelling at the back of my throat. She prodded about a bit, then insisted I go directly to the hospital to the Ear, Nose and Throat department. ‘Today? As in now?’ I said. ‘Yes, now!’

I popped home to get my bike and a book (prepared for sitting around in waiting rooms) and pedalled to the hospital. After only about 20 minutes wait I was lead to a room with diagrams of (not surprisingly) the ear, nose and throat. The doctor sat me down, handed me what can only be described as a sterile spittoon that looked like a giant’s prophylactic. I said ‘Aaaah’ a couple of times, he sprayed my mouth with a numbing spray and then produced a syringe to drain the ‘tut tut tut’ inducing growth. Next out came a scalpel and he cut out a wad of matter to be sent away for biopsy. ‘It all seems to be benign’ he said, ‘but I’d like to operate in the coming weeks’. Great.

The anaesthetic they gave me was timed to last exactly the journey home and as I walked into the door, agony struck. Unable to speak or swallow, I got into bed and shook into an uncomfortable sleep. I woke up in the middle of the night realising how hard it would be to perform two gigs without the ability to, er speak….

24 hours have now gone by and the pain has gone down… I think I’ll be able to do the gigs (with the aid of a bit of paracetamol), but am worried that an operation will take me out for a couple of well paid business gigs next month… Maybe I can learn sign language?

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Blog Update: Stripes News

21 May 21:34

WEEK 21 »

"A week full to the brim with LFC football…. Div 5 LFC match against Nåjdens FK has been moved. This is due to the Svenska Cupen final: 26 May, 17.00 kick off, Nationalarenan Friends Arena, Solna. Next match is on Tuesday (see below). ………………………………………………………… Friday: Div5 Ladies: Rotebro IS FF – Långholmen FC (Skinnaråsens IP) KO: 16.15 ………………………………………………………… Saturday: Vets: Långholmen FC – IFK..." READ »

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