• Sweden edition

Swedetalker

The journal of language rookie Patrick Reilly

Day 20 – A Major Change Required

In the immortal of words of John Major ‘it is time to get back to basics.’ Today was not good. Not good at all. Allow me to elaborate.

In our second session of the day our teacher asked us to work in pairs to complete a relatively routine exercise which was describing items in a typical Swedish kitchen. Now my classmate and I weren’t exactly au fait with what we had to do and to put it frankly, we made an absolute balls of it. A double act of Stevie Wonder and David Blunkett would have done better than us chancers.  At one point we started to draw random kitchen appliances in our notebooks. Embarrassing.

Twould be nice to think that was the nadir of the day but it got even worse in our weekly conversation class where a polite old lady attempts to gauge us into speaking Svenska. I hesitated with my answers and generally struggled to understand a word this old dear was rambling on about. I think she mentioned knitting at one point but then again I did resemble a lost boy in need of assistance. Bloody hell my head hurts…

Report abuse »

19 responses to “Day 20 – A Major Change Required”

  1. Paul Maloney says:

    Hahahah look who it is!
    Ya Bloody Irish hick lol

    Your accent really comes out in your writing.

    Paul

    Report abuse »

  2. Martin says:

    Don’t worry, I firmly believe that one can go through ex-pat life perfectly fine without ever learning the names of birds, flowers or kitchen appliances in a foreign language.

    I’m a Swede living in Dublin since 2006, and I don’t know what a visp, maskros or talgoxe are called in English, and I’d be very surprised to find me in a life or death situation where these words are required.

    Thinking about it, I hardly know the English word for kastrull.. hmm.. pot? saucepan?

    Report abuse »

  3. Nicholas Reilly says:

    I am a Scotsman living in Malmo, and I also followed the girlfriend trail back to Sweden.

    Good luck with your work at SFI. It’s not a easy task to learn a new language, more so Swedish. I studied at SFI Komvux (Malmo) last year and I also was the only english speaking person there. It may seem as a disadvantage but it forces you to speak the lingo faster.

    Do people find it hard when you speak Swedish with an Irish accent?

    Report abuse »

  4. swedetalker says:

    Hej Martin
    Hope you’ve managed to discern the differences between the Dublin accents. Not sure if there is a direct translation for ‘gurrier’ and ‘gouger.’ You were spot on with kastrull as I got a present of WordFinder. Will check if it translates into Dublish also :)

    Report abuse »

  5. swedetalker says:

    Cheers for the feedback. I’ve been told my Irish accent is fairly thin so on the few occasions I pipe up with some svenska I’m told I sound English. As a Scot I’m sure you’ll appreciate how disturbing this is so a few slaps are usually given in response. Learning a new language certainly gets you out of the comfort zone and it’s definitely best to not sit beside any native English speakers if you want to progress. I’m slowly getting there…

    Report abuse »

  6. swedetalker says:

    Cheers mate. Where were you today? Your Aussie wit was sorely missed!

    Report abuse »

  7. Martin says:

    Yeah, the Dublin accents are fine, I still have some troubles with a colleague from County Tyrone though. And when I first got to Dublin I moved into a place called the Custom House Harbour. No Irish ever understood my address on the phone until I learned the trick of replacing u:s with å. “Cåstom House Harbour” has worked fine ever since. As has Dåbblin, påbb and, bågg

    Oh, and by the way, back in 2006 I made this little list slightly inspired by some Australians who have compiled a “you know you have been in Sweden too long when…”-list:

    YOU KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN IN IRELAND TOO LONG WHEN…

    When something is good bad or indifferent you say “grand”

    You don’t do a double take when you see people in the street wearing pajamas

    You accept that “half four” is 4:30 and not 3:30.

    You sit and pretend that Rugby is a great substitute for Ice Hockey.

    You can keep a two-way conversation going for more than 5 minutes with the taxi driver

    You learn to listen to somebody from Cork without laughing.

    You regard Guiness and Chicken Wings a gourmet dinner

    You consider a sandwich to be a reasonable lunch.

    You accept that crisps are eaten at lunch together with sandwiches.

    You think nothing of wearing shoes indoors.

    You accept wall to wall carpeting.

    You accept your friends entering your wall to wall carpeted apartment with shoes on.

    You try to change your accent so it sounds less English.

    You accept that you can no longer take the ferry to Finland to resupply your stock of cheap duty free alcohol.

    When opening the sports pages you easily distinguish between articles covering Hurling, Gaelic Football, Rugby and Football.

    You accept that there are no timetables for busses, and that you have to wait at least 25 minutes for a bus if you are in a hurry.

    When going to England you use the word Garda instead of police

    You start spelling days of the week in upper case! Måndag, Tisdag …

    Paying €5 for a pint seems normal

    And paying €400 000 for a small two bedroom brick house in a suburb of Dublin seems cheap [this one might need updating]

    You accept that incoming packages can only be picked up 9-17 on business days in a post office at least 10 miles from where you live.

    You start caring about who wins the Heineken Cup.

    You know who Ronan O’Gara is.

    You finally give in and buy an umbrella

    When using a Swedish version of excel you get error messages because you have used periods instead of comas

    Report abuse »

  8. swedetalker says:

    Your list made me laugh big time. Jätteroligt! Happy Saint Patrick’s Day and I hope you are sinking a few non expensive pints in the auld capital city. I spent my day trying to communicate with a Mongolian student på svenska. The language Gods were surely not amused. Jaysus

    Report abuse »

  9. Jo says:

    Before you run into another dreaded household exercise in your Swedish classes, grab yourself a DVD of the Bent Hamer film “Kitchen Stories” (IFC Films, 2003 – in Norwegian and Swedish). You’ll never look at that type of assignment the same way again….

    I am still enjoying the expressions on my Norwegian friends’ faces as I attempt their language, merrily combining it with Spanish, French, and the odd mispronounced Swedish words, overlaid with an American accent and boosted by a tendency to come out with British expressions of mild dismay (“oh, bugger”). It only gets harder as you get older, so you’re on the right track, and I’m enjoying following your journey.

    Should you ever attempt German and find yourself in a similar situation, by the way, one word for “breadboard” is “das brettchen.” It was the only free-standing German word my grammar-school teacher ever managed to get me to remember, and I’ve remembered it for roughly 35 years, heaven help me. As the 10 of us who took the class for two years pretty much learned to sing “Stille Nacht” and how to polka, we should be a great hit if we ever have a reunion in Leipzig.

    A belated Happy St. Patty’s Day to you, and lycka till!

    Report abuse »

  10. swedetalker says:

    Thanks for the message. Made me smile :) I’ll definitely check out the DVD and report some feedback. Strangely enough the only language I ever really wanted to learn was German probably because I spent many hours of my misspent youth watching RTL and DSF on Sky. Something to do with the pronunciation or maybe it’s simply because I’m used to being shouted at! Going to stick with Swedish for the time being but perhaps ‘Germtalker’ will be the next project. Mind you that sounds like some kind of disease.

    Report abuse »

  11. I’ll check out the information that you mentioned. Buy Kamagra Gel I think you have a lot of thing to show us, like the website. By the way , that phrase above, is one of my favorites, and I really think the language Gods were surely not amused by Cheap Generic Viagra

    Report abuse »

  12. edegra says:

    It’s time to act responsible and join hands to get over the fear of breast cancer by getting ourselves screened for it.
    More than 2 million men in the US count themselves as prostate cancer survivors. Whether you’re worried about developing prostate cancer, making decisions about your treatment, or trying to stay well after treatment…

    Report abuse »

  13. Thanks for sharing .Keep posting articles like this.A good example of content presentation.A piece of information from you every now and then is really great.Great article post.I appreciate your writing skills.They are excellent.The knowledge of the subject is pretty good.To post an article on any topic it takes a great effort and knowledge to have proper knowledge of the niche.
    Discount Viagra

    Report abuse »

  14. silagra says:

    Wow, a real surprise. Yours was always the first blog I’d turn to.

    Report abuse »

  15. [url=http://livepaperhelp.com/research-paper-topics.html] research paper topics [/url]

    Report abuse »

  16. rewprapse says:

    farmacia online italia //www.farmacia-italia.net/] here

    Report abuse »

  17. it’s good topic for me

    //rx-europharm.com/] euro pharmacy

    Report abuse »

  18. Thx for this great information that you are sharing with us!!!

    Report abuse »

Leave a reply

By posting a comment you agree to be bound by The Local's terms and conditions.


Highlights from Follow Sweden

20 things to know before moving to Sweden

As diverse as Sweden is, there are a few societal norms that are distinctly Swedish. Understanding a handful of them will hopefully prepare you culturally before you relocate. When you're invited home to a Swede, you better be on time and take your shoes off, writes expat Lola Akinmade-Åkerström. Read more »

How far can English take you in Sweden?

Sweden is a country where almost everyone can speak English. So why bother to learn Swedish? Edina Varnagy from Hungary managed with English for a whole year but then found that Swedish could open doors – to a job, a social life and greater understanding. Read more »

Blog Update: Julie's Nordic Island

12 February 21:30

The consciousness of one »

"The ice dripped in the winter sun. It was the first day when the light had been intense enough to cause dripping in the sunlight. To hear it was an extraordinary wakeup call. The cycle was happening again as it always does, always will (or so we think). I imagined that on my summer island, the bees..." READ »

Highlights
afhunta (File)
DATING »
A Valentine's Day look at how how sex, booze and mobile phones can unravel that tantalizing mystery known as the strong, silent Nordic type
The Local
SOCIETY »
The Local's Oliver Gee finds out why the star of Sweden's version of 'The Office' thinks Sweden is the most PC country in the world
Micheal Brauer/Flickr (File)
SCIENCE & TECH »
'Drunkorexia' on the rise in Sweden: report
Alexander Lervik and Johan Carper
LIFESTYLE »
Seven Swedish designs that will blow your mind
Eva Rinadi Celebrity and Live Music Photography/Flickr
SOCIETY »
Star Wars in Swedish causes fan outrage
www.dotoday.se
LIFESTYLE »
What's On: The Local's guide to upcoming attractions and events in Stockholm, Gothenburg and Malmö.
OLIKA Publishing
OPINION »
The Swedish language needs a new pronoun free of preconceived notions about gender, a Swedish linguist and representatives from a publishing house argue
Madonna set for July 4th concert in Sweden
SOCIETY »
Madonna set for July 4th concert in Sweden
TV4
GALLERY »
An inside look at 'The Office' in Swedish
Georgios M.W (File)
SOCIETY »
Swedish mother gave 3-year-old cigs and beer
Photo: Fredrik Persson/Scanpix
SOCIETY »
A duvet cover designed to look like cardboard boxes, on sale at a luxury department store in Stockholm, has some arguing that the city's homeless are being exploited for profit.
Ann Catrin Brockman/Flickr (File)
LIFESTYLE »
Five Swedish songs that never made Eurovision
Q&A with Swenglish comedy star Ben Kersley
LIFESTYLE »
Swenglish comedy star Ben Kersley explains how ‘three bespectacled English guys’ plan to make Swedes laugh
Photo: Screenshot YouTube
SOCIETY »
Move over Bugs – a Swedish bunny is rapidly becoming the most popular rabbit in the world!
Photo: Sony Pictures
SPONSORED ARTICLE
How Millennium films tap deep into Swedish angst
Photo: Helena Wahlman
SPONSORED ARTICLE
Braving the cold: Ten reasons to spend winter in Sweden
Photo: ECLA
SPONSORED ARTICLE
A truly international education at the heart of Berlin
Turning Point Counseling
Turning Point Counselling centre offers the international community of Stockholm a safe space for personal development, counselling and coaching.
http://www.turning-point.se/show.asp
Swedish Down Town
Swedish Down Town PR Consulting and Productions is an innovative business company which provides valuable assistance with Public Relations and Communications in the swedish and the international market.
www.swedishdowntown.com
The Local's new Marketplace
Find products and services that are specifically focused on English speakers living in Sweden!
FULL DETAILS
English Speaking Therapist Stockholm
British-Australian Male Counsellor. Counselling Therapy for Depression, Mental Health, Sex, Relationship & Expat Issues
08-559 22 636 or CLICK HERE
Counseling in English
Individuals & Couples - Stockholm Beth Rogerson PhD - Clinical, Marriage & Family Therapist
Click or call 08-5580 1266 now
Doctor of Psychology
Therapy in English in Stockholm Trained in California Individuals & Couples (08) 93 81 48 FREE phone consultation
Visit anxiousorblue.se
Get on the Tennis Court with www.babolatshop.se
The new Online Tennis Store with the largest selection of Babolat Products in Sweden
http://www.babolatshop.se