From Seattle to Stockholm

Truth be told, 2011 wasn’t that great of a year, but it did manage to see some truly spectacular music. Please take the time to read about what I consider to be the ten best albums of the year:

1. Det Vackra Livet by Det Vackra Livet – Some might say I’m slightly biased towards most things Swedish. This may be true, but I uphold that my love of this album would prevail with or without said bias. Det Vackra Livet , which means “the beautiful life”, is a magical blend of 80’s new-wave pop and more modern dreampop/shoegaze. The opening track, “Kristallen” will immediately bring to mind only the best that bands like The Smiths and The Cure had to offer at their peak. The album, which is entirely in Swedish, is beautifully melancholic while at the same time oddly optimistic. Truly, this is the most solid collection of songs I have heard in many years, not just in 2011. I implore those of you who have not heard this album: do not let the language barrier keep you from this masterpiece. I do have my favoutire tracks, but cannot bring myself to list them- the entire album must be given equal attention.

2. The Big Roar by The Joy Formidable – If I were to sum up The Big Roar in one word, it would be ‘epic’. You don’t simply listen to this album, you fucking experience it. The opening track will grab you by the ears and force you into a zombie-like trance, and at the end of it all, you’ll just be like “What just happened?!” It’s for that exact reason that I have a hard time naming individual tracks by name- they all blend together into this one big mushy, fuzzy glob of goddamn-amazing. Luckily, thanks to iTunes, I can say that the standout tracks are: ” The Greatest Light Is The Greatest Shade”, ” Greyhounds In The Slips”, and my favourite, “Buoy”.

3. Samsara by To/Die/For – It’s hard for me to classify what kind of sound To/Die/For creates. I usually liken them to the mixing of 80’s bands like Cutting Crew and A-Ha, and modern hard rock bands like HIM (makes sense as they’re both from Finland), and on my iTunes they are listed as Goth Rock… but they’re so much more than any of that. They create songs with such great melodies and amazing guitar riffs, resulting in what I consider to be the epitome of great rock. Samsara is their first album in 5 years, following 2006’s Wounds Wide Open, which I consider to be their weakest offering. It was only a few years ago that the band announced a break-up, and the lead vocalist began working on a new project, but lo and behold, they straightened themselves out and have produced one of their best albums ever. Standout tracks include: “Hail of Bullets”, “Love’s A Sickness”, and my favourite, “Damned Rapture”.

4. Devotion Implosion by Gliss – Okay, technically this album isn’t from 2011.. it’s from 2009, butlemmeexplain!! I discovered Gliss when they opened for Glasvegas this summer and, to be honest, we didn’t pay them much attention. A few days later I decided to check their album out and was blown away, kicking myself for not seeing their entire set. This is shoegazer rock at its finest: melodic, moody, and fuzzy as hell! I enjoyed this album so much that I felt obligated to include it in this list. Standout tracks include: “Lovers in the Bathroom”, “29 Acts of Love”, and my favourite, “Morning Light”.

5. Portamento by The Drums – One of the greatest things about The Drums’ sophomore effort is its simplicity. There are moments in the album where, if you closed your eyes, you might feel as if the band were playing these songs for you live, in your room, bringing an intense intimacy that I haven’t felt with a collection of songs in a long time. Standout tracks include: “Hard to Love”, “Days”, and my favourite, “I Don’t Know How to Love”.

6. Dominoes by Eva & The Heartmaker – There seems to be a resurgence of that classic 80’s new-wave pop sound these days, and Eva & The Heartmaker are easily leading that pack. Synthesizers, sweet vocals, jangly guitars, and electronic drums all come together in harmony, producing an album full of songs you’ll find yourself humming in the shower or on the road. It’s pure pop that I don’t feel dirty for enjoying. Standout tracks include: “Mr. Tokyo”, “Signals”, and my favourite, “Gone In a Flash”.

7. Sounds of a Playground Fading by In Flames – In Flames started out as, what would generally be accepted as a traditional Swedish melodic death metal band. This is very heavy metal music accompanied by guttural growls and screams in place of actual singing. I typically don’t care for this type of rock, and that would explain why I don’t particularly care for In Flames’ earlier stuff. But, the band has evolved over the years, reaching its apex with 2008’s A Sense of Purpose, in which the music became more melodic, less death-y, and actual vocals were used in place of Cookie Monster growls (though still a bit scream-y). It’s also the album where many die-hard fans began crying foul, saying the band had sold out. Perhaps, but fuck those fans. They can go back to cranking all those other bands they love that no one has ever heard of. Sounds of a Playground Fading builds off of A Sense of Purpose’s foundation, though the evolution has slowed a bit. The tunes are catchy and you can actually sing along to them. Win/win! Standout tracks include: “Where the Dead Ships Dwell”, “Fear Is the Weakness”, and my favourite, “Deliver Us”.

8. Bel Air by Guano Apes – Nostalgia gets a bad rap sometimes, especially when music is concerned. It can be quite easy to become musically “stuck” by means of nostalgia (ie: still cranking nothing but stuff you loved in high school… 20+ years later). Every once in a while, however, nostalgia comes up with ways to sneak up on you. Enter Bel Air by Guano Apes, a mid-90’s sounding band from Germany and also… the mid-90’s. Bel Air is their first LP in about eight years, and is easily their strongest. Listening to it brought me back to the days when angst-ridden female grunge vocalists were a dime a dozen. Bands like Garbage, Artificial Joy Club, and Salt came instantly to mind. However, Guano Apes manage to mask that mid-90’s sound in timeless melodies and hooks that have the ability to make you forget about eras and simply enjoy the music. Standout tracks include: “Sunday Lover”, “The Time”, and my favourite, “Carol And Shine”.

9. Hats Off to the Bull by Chevelle – If you didn’t know any better, you might write Chevelle off as one of those nu-metal bands from the early 2000’s that all decided to come out at the same time… and nothing more. And you’d be a fool to do so. Chevelle is one of the only bands to come from that time who has actually gotten better with age. In fact, I have thoroughly enjoyed their last three albums more so than any of their others. To me, they are what Tool could have been if they had taken Undertow and made it more radio-friendly. Commercial? Maybe. But still really damn good. The funny thing about Hats Off to the Bull is that, prior to writing this, only one track stood out to me. But, one or two songs does not an album make, and it’s the album, as a whole, that stands out as one of the best of the year. My favourite track: “Face to the Floor”.

10. Framebreaker by Return To Mono – Like many genres, Trip Hop has evolved from its beginnings. Bands like Portishead and Morcheeba paved the way for their heirs like Phantogram and SPC ECO. If you like any of these bands, you will like Return to Mono. The songs are moody and dark, and swim in an ocean of electronic noise and ambience, as Tanya Kelleher’s jazzy, bluesy, torch singer vocals pierce the electronic film on a gentle, yet sharp edge of echo. Standout tracks include: “Song of the Beast”, “Seeker Circuit”, and my favourite, “Doomsday Device”.

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You know, I kept meaning to write a new post once I got back from my most recent trip to Stockholm… but I just didn’t. My third trip in one years time, I was actually in Stockholm to mark the anniversary of my first visit, so that was very cool. I was able to spend a lot of time with many of the friends I’ve made in Stockholm as well as meet a few new people. Everyone is always so friendly, I love it.

After six straight months of working two jobs and going to school, all I wanted to do once I got to Sweden was nothing! And aside from cramming 13+ people into Anna’s tiny apartment, going to Fotografiska, and attending a cd release party for Self Deception, I didn’t do much. Well… I drank a lot, but that should have been expected.

I think the uncertainty of how I’ll exactly get over to Sweden long term, the possibility that it is still years off, and the discouraging perspectives of some of my Swedish friends has me wondering if it’ll ever really happen. Not to say that I don’t want it to, I still do. I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see. In the meantime, my busy life continues. I already have the next two quarters of school lined up and there’s still no end in sight. I am meeting with a Realtor this week to discuss selling my house… scary!

I guess that’s it for now. Sorry it took me so long to make an entry. Life.

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I don’t think I’ve mentioned it much here on this blog, but I do dabble in recording music. I recently decided to work on some unfinished songs that had been sitting for a while and have finally completed them. If you’re interested in hearing my music (which is mostly hard rock with a gothic edge) you can check out my myspace page:

http://www.myspace.com/000negative1

As for everything else. Same old stuff, really. Most of my friends were stunned I managed to find time to work on music between my two jobs and school! I am certainly looking forward to being back in Sweden at the end of March.

That’s all I got for now.

Tack!

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Although it has admittedly been a while since I last wrote anything here, I must say that it seems like it’s been so much longer. Oddly, I now measure time by my visits (both prior and future) to Stockholm. And while I’ve been home for just over two months, it feels like so much more… nine perhaps.

So what have I been doing during this drawn out stretch of existence? Not a damn thing! And maybe therein lies the reason for my skewed perception of passing time. Of course, “not a damn thing” is a tad untrue. Since I’ve been home I’ve started my second quarter at South Seattle, gotten a new roommate, recorded a new song, had a weeklong vacation, and the other little this-and-that-these-and-those of life… but it all has just felt so tedious and boring!

Most of that has to do with cause and effect: school (as well as working the UW Husky football home games) took up my remaining free weeknights while also eating into my weekends. Any time I had left after all of this was sparse and I normally found (and still find) it hard to actually want to do anything aside from resting or just doing nothing. On my week of vacation I had intended to work on a few yet-to-be-completed songs I have waiting in the wings. Instead I worked on math and English assignments and spent the rest of the time playing video games and going out drinking.

It’s also interesting to me how my focus on school, which is driven by my motivation to move to Sweden, has served to remove Sweden from the forefront of my mind. I have done very little to practice my Swedish as the time to do so always seems to escape me. Just last week I received an email from a friend, Susanna, who lives in Sweden. She always writes to me in Swedish and it was such a nice feeling to have that practice again. It’s made me yearn for more, but the communications between me and my Swedish friends has diminished in the midst of our busy lives, much to my dismay.

I’ve been thinking of returning to Stockholm around the end of March, between the winter and spring quarters, but the timeframes are tight and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to do it. I want to though… very much. The intensified detachment I feel at home has only made that feeling of limbo grow. Do I belong anywhere?

Today I met my friend Kevin for lunch and coffee. He’ll be in San Francisco tomorrow for a job interview, one more reminder that the only constant is change.

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It’s only been eleven days since I returned home from my second trip to Stockholm, yet it seems like it’s been months. It feels like so much has changed and still everything is the same… but then again, I think most of the changes that have emerged from my Sweden trips have been internal.

Shortly after I got home, the wonderful Seattle weather began showing itself: grey skies and rain; and I couldn’t have been happier about it! I know most people simply can’t comprehend those of us who actually prefer this type of weather to bright, warm, sunny days… and I can’t really explain it myself- but there is a comfort I feel in this weather. I really do love it. I can’t wait for it to start getting darker earlier. Am I crazy? Some might say so, but I just think I know what makes me happy.

I’ve been super busy since I got home: I spent all of last week and today doing a special project that was both physically draining and mind numbing. Adding to that, I started covering the UW Husky home games again. They’ll eat into some of my weekends but the money more than makes up for it… and I’ve already started thinking about my next trip to Stockholm. I really want to go during winter as well as visit some other cities. Still trying to figure out when exactly though as I have to plan it around school now. Ugh! School. The Fall quarter starts in one week and I am SO not looking forward to it.

I’ve been feeling quite detached these last few days. Maintaining the balance between my present and my future is becoming more difficult as they grow closer to one another. I love Seattle and all of my friends here, but something else calls to me and it’s hard not to feel a tad guilty about that. It reminds me of when I left Sacramento to move to Seattle (though in that case I wasn’t going to miss the city at all… just my friends). Who knows? I think I’m rambling anyway… my thoughts aren’t feeling very cohesive at the moment.

Maybe I’m just a bit eager to begin the next chapter.

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Well, I got back from my second trip to Stockholm yesterday. The thing with this trip was that I really had no idea what to expect. Last time I knew that there would be the whole “toursity” phase that could have easily lasted the entire trip (which it thankfully did not)… but this trip wasn’t going to be like that. My main goal was to really explore the friendships that I had begun at the end of my last trip and had tried to maintain on Facebook over the past 6 months. Also, I really wanted to experience life in Stockholm as much as a local as possible. I can honestly say that this latest trip was exactly what I wanted… and then some. I got to spend A LOT of time with my friends there, and I really feel like those relationships grew quite a bit. The level of familiarity that I feel in Stockholm also grew and it hardly felt like I was “on vacation 4000+ miles away from home”… it felt like I was home.

What’s funny (and kind of sad, too) is that pretty much every friend I’ve made there in Stockholm has plans of leaving. Most of them have a strong dislike of the city and the people that live there and they have a hard time understanding why I want to move there. By now I’ve given up on trying to convey that reason to anyone really… but I kind of get why they have a hard time grasping the concept. It sucks to think that by the time I actually make it over there, none of these wonderful friends I’ve made will be there… but I’m not going to let that dissuade me. Now, more than ever, this move feels very do-able.

But, in the meantime, I’m back here in Seattle, working, studying, and everything else I can fit into my free time. Life continues. I miss Stockholm and even more, I miss my friends there.

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Well, eventhough I bought my tickets back in early June, the fact that I’ll be back in Stockholm on Tuesday finally feels “real”. My stay this time will be shorter, but I expect that I’ll have more fun since I’ll be staying with friends and not playing “tourist” as much as last time.

So what am I going to do while I’m there? I have no idea… and I don’t really even care… I just want to be back.

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This has nothing to do with Sweden or anything but I thought it was funny so…

Back sometime in the early part of 2001, I was part of a goth-online-dating/social-network… I don’t even remember what it was called now. At the time I was really interested in meeting a goth girl… for obvious reasons. Anyway, I met a girl through that site (whose name I can’t remember either… (I want to say “Robin”, but whatever), she lived somewhere near El Dorado Hills (near Sacramento, CA). Her picture looked fake as fuck now that I think about it. It was a very grainy, professional looking picture of a woman near what looked like a castle, her back to the camera. It was very obscure and I wasn’t sure it was really even her, but she sounded cool and we talked a bunch through email and IM so I eventually agreed to meet up with her.

On the night we had arranged, I drove to her (actually, her parents’) house deep in the back roads of wherever the hell she lived. Shortly off of the freeway, the road to her place became unpaved, quite narrow, and very twisted. There were several times I was worried about wrecking, as her place was several miles down this road .Her house was fairly large with a small vineyard in front that her parents apparently owned. I remember seeing her for the first time as I walked to her front door; she was pretty overweight, looked nothing like her “picture” and I was quite disappointed… but I was polite and hung out with her as she had made me dinner. She was supposedly the singer of a goth band. She went on telling me how all their equipment had recently been stolen, and how she might be leaving them and joining some other band and blah blah blah. I had told her to record some of her music for me prior to our meeting and as I left her house that night she gave me a cassette tape that had various goth music on it… and also a few songs by her “band”.

When I listened to the tape later there was one song in the selection of her “band’s” songs that I was totally in love with… but the recording was shit, like it had been dubbed many, many times. So I asked her about the song and if she had a cd copy of it. She never told me the name of the song, said that she had a cd “somewhere” but that she would have to find it and, again, blah blah blah. The song was really good… like REALLY fucking good… but I was never convinced that it was really her and her “band”. I never did get a better copy of the song and eventually she and I lost contact.

Fast forward to around 6 months ago when it was that I discovered a goth band, Claire Voyant (who happened to be from Sacramento)… There was a song on their latest album, Lustre, called “Into Oblivion” and the vocals in that song instantly reminded me of something I’d heard before. I had looked for their other albums but could never find any of them (for free anyways). So, today I was driving home from the grocery store and, being a little tired of listening to Kent, I popped in a cd that had Claire Voyant on it, and “Into Oblivion” came on. It finally clicked that the vocals reminded me of that song “Robin” had taped for me some 10 years ago, and them being from Sacramento made even more sense. I knew that all of their albums were on Amazon so I decided to sample some of the older songs. I was convinced “Robin’s” song would be among them…

I started with an album of theirs that was released around the time I met her… and the INSTANT the preview for track 4 began I knew it was the song. So fucking funny! This is a song I haven’t heard in at least 9 years, always wanted, that I got from a chick who I knew was lying to me about its origins… and 10 years later, I find it, as if I had just heard it yesterday. I decided to finally break down and actually buy the cd. But in the meantime, I was able to find a decent mp3 version of the song, which is called “Everafter”.

As an aside, as I was listening to this song, it brought me back to that time which seems so very long ago now. I realized that I was so into this song at the time that I was inspired to write a song of my own in the same style. It is called “Drown”, and I wrote it in the early part of 2001.

Hejdå!

-j

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Yes, one month from today I will be on a plane headed back to Stockholm. Ugh! I can’t wait!!! I know it’s been a long time since last I posted anything… maybe nothing much has been happening, or maybe I’ve been way too busy to think about blogging (not that I think about it that much anyway). Whatever the reason, I’m posting now, so get over it (all… one or two of you!).

So I am back in school… though it doesn’t really feel like school yet. Right now, for the summer quarter, I’m taking a computer art class which, while fun, is super easy. But in the Fall I’ll be taking a math and English class. That’s when I think it’ll really feel like “school” again. You know… when it sucks. But at least I’m sticking with my plan.

Aside from that there hasn’t been much to speak of. I’ve kept in contact with the core group of people I met in Stockholm and am really looking forward to seeing them again. I’ve been slacking on my Rosetta Stone lessons but have still maintained a steady stream of Kent songs that I’ve been learning. I love Kent… I don’t even care anymore that they totally abandoned their rock roots (though it would be cool to hear a new Kent “rock” album again).

I guess that’s it. I wish I had more to say… I wish things were moving faster… but things are how they are and we must simply deal with it.

Until next time

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So it’s been slightly more than a month since I returned from Stockholm. It feels so much longer than that though. Maybe that’s because being there made me realize how ready I am to really make the move… and more so- how ready I am for major change in my life in general. Unfortunately, my plans are going to take some time…

When I got home I was super motivated and within a few days I met with a real estate agent to discuss selling my house. I knew that the market was crappy… but I guess I didn’t realize just how crappy it was! I quickly realized that there was no way I could sell my house without severely shooting myself in the foot… at least now. It was quite a blow to the high I was still on from a great first experience in Sweden. That, coupled with the return to my daily grind and routine, really caused a bit of a depression. Nothing major, but I was greatly deflated and at a loss for what to do next.

But, as things settled down and I was able to think more rationally I came up with a revised plan. go back to school. I figure two years is a good amount of time to give the market a chance to recover a little more. Meanwhile, I will work on getting an AA degree, which will probably help my chances of getting into school in Sweden later on. And, while I’m still with my current employer, I can take advantage of their tuition reimbursement program.

As for what I am going to study – I have no freakin’ idea! I think I will start with some general studies courses and see where that takes me. I haven’t been to school since 1997 so I’m basically starting over. Quite nerve racking.

So, it looks like I’ll be in Seattle a tad longer than I had originally hoped, but hopefully things will all work out. In the meantime, I am planning on a second visit to Stockholm at the end of August. Can’t wait!

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