(edit title) Very unhealthy relationship & Sambo Visa EU citizen - Urgent Advice Needed Options

[MaryS2012]

I am a UK citizen who has been living in Malmö for a year and 3 months on a sambo visa with my Swedish boyfriend (unusual I know, but I did not have enough money to be granted EU right of residence and I did not have a job offer). Basically, my relationship has turned increasingly emotionally abusive over time and I know, as much as I love him, I need to get away from him. I love my new life in Sweden. My future career prospects, when I master Swedish, are excellent. I don't want benefits. If I leave him my sambo visa is revoked. I need to know what I can do to safely get away from him while staying in this country (my family situation in the UK is very unstable).

I do not have enough money to support myself and do not qualify for EU self-supported right of residence right now. My Swedish is improving fast but it is nowhere near the standard I need to give me a decent chance of getting a job. I have tried calling in with my CV to places but am having no luck.

Any ideas?

[John.Smith]

If you are being abused then you need to get out of the situation ASAP. The fastest and most direct way to do this is to go back to the UK. If you really do want to come and live in Sweden, then find a job in the UK, save up money and plan round two when you can support yourself and do not need to rely on anyone else.

Without being able to earn an income here you have few options... if any at all.

[John.Smith]

I should also suggest that if the abuse gets too difficult to handle, then contact the embassy and seek assistance to get back to the UK.

[MaryS2012]

Thanks for your replies. He does get (sporadic) help from our vårdcentral but he is still in denial.

I don't fear for my physical safety but his manipulation and bullying is horrendous especially as he is aware that I had an abusive upbringing. For that reason, it is difficult for me to consider moving home to England where all my memories are.

I am 3 months into an intensive SFI course (C & D) and have made friends here. I am so close to being in a position where I can work and support myself. To give this up, to return to England, where there are no jobs in my area would destroy me. I am 39yrs old. I highly doubt I would ever have the real chance to return to Sweden.

I know returning to the UK may be my only choice but I was just wondering if anyone had any bright ideas of a way to stay here? I will work the crappiest job and study 24/7. I want to make this work.

[byke]

Afraid I dont have any advice, apart from it may be best to take a step backwards to be able to continue forwards.

[johnjohn]

Under the Sambo visa you should qualify for arbetsformedelingen's instegjobbs program which pays a great deal of your wages. Also check out the SFI bonus eligibility and good luck.

[MaryS2012]

I don't apply for the job program as, although I'm on a sambo visa, I'm from the EU. I even offered to work for free in one of the placements as I thought maybe it would help me get my foot in the door but it was a flat out no. I am eligible for the SFI bonus but I think I won't get that for another 2 or 3 months.

[byke]

Mary, if your relationship is going pete tong and requires medicating your partner.
Then there has to be some serious concern regarding your situation, especially in regards to your self dependance abilities.

If you need help, seek it (UK Embassy)
And that doesn't mean looking for message board support ... as all this prairie dogging will eventually lead you with nothing but a mess you cant get out of in the middle of nowhere.

Contact the embassy, explain your situation.
Just make sure that you speak to a real staff member, rather than a 3rd party employed Swede with a british accent - as there can be stark differences between expectations and cultural differences / values in regards to getting the correct support you may need.

[johnjohn]

RE-check the rules as I think you DO qualify.

[MaryS2012]

I double-checked the Arbetsförmedlingen website and it does say 'Step-in-jobs can not be granted to citizens from EU/EES or Switzerland'.

Maybe the rules have changed over the past few years.

Does anyone know of any EU citizen who successfully got an instegsjobb?

It's frustrating but I do understand why they don't allow EU citizens to be eligible. I wish they could just make one exception!

[nickachu]

In step jobs aren't available to eu citizens, but new start jobs are, and also swedes too. The company gets 30% back and the taxes I think, so not quite as good but still better than nothing! I got a new start one summer before last and it was a doodle if you have a company that wants you.

[Yorkshireman]

As You have the UT based on relationship, if the relationship ends, normally the permit would not be renewed. There are 3 exceptions to that rule:

1. If the relationship has ended mainly because of serious or repeated incidents of degrading treatment. The relationship must have been of a serious, long-term, nature. It must appear likely that incidents of degrading treatment have taken place. To show that degrading treatment has occurred, it may help to refer to police reports, doctors' or medical certificates, and certificates from the social services and shelters.

2. You have a connection to Sweden. This might be to your child who has a right to stay in Sweden, to a new partner or to the labour market if you have been employed.

3. You risk being excluded socially if you return to your country of origin, or if you are seriously ill or severely disabled.

Since You are an EU citizen, even if Your relationship ends, You can always just pop across into say Denmark and come straight back into Sweden, and stay an extra 6 months as an EU job seeker, without needing to re-register

Mind You, After 1+ years here, you should already be entitled to the very basic level of unemployment benefit? And probably housing benefit also. The only problem would be finding an apartment, though You could check with Your local community, sometimes they have special reserved small apartments for emergencies and short stays.

If You need a place in a Woman's Shelter, maybe this organisation can help You: www.roks.se , or, http://www.kvinnojouren.se/

Don't stay believing the difficult period will pass ... doesn't sound like it will :S

Get Out. Be Safe.

[Migga]

Sweden has several organizations that look to help and support women in abusive relationships. You should turn to kvinnojouren and call their hotline for help or advice. The national number for kvinnofridslinjen is 020-50 50 50 and the one for Malmö is 040-29 09 99.

[JulieLou40]

My heart goes out to you. I've been involved in something similar, and it's awful. I was going to mention the stuff from the Migrationsverket website about not neccessarily having permits revoked if you've been abused, but saw that another poster had already mentioned it.

If you would like to PM me to chat, please feel free.

Good luck with everything.

[Case officer]

You have nine months left of your residence permit. You can ignore the likelihood that the Migration Board will spend time to revoke your permit if your relationship ends, considering the short time left. A formal decision is necessary to revoke a permit and the Migration Board is swamped with more urgent matters. This means that you can stay in Sweden legally until your permit expires next summer.

When your permit expires you have the right to stay in Sweden if you can support yourself. Do you think you'll be able to find a job by then?