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Is life in US that great?

Here's my story, suggest me..

post 25.Jun.2010, 01:04 AM
Post #1
Joined: 25.Jun.2010

Heres my story, I came from a Non EU - Non US country to Sweden for master studies few years ago. I completed a master degree here, meanwhile I met an European girl, and fell in love with her. She said me after studies we should move to together, but after completing my degree, I wanted to study an other degree, so I asked her to wait as I wanted to study more. She stayed with me, waiting for my studies to be over.
Now that I'm done with that, I have a desire to take doctoral studies from some good US school as I know there is a lots of research going on in US compared to EU. I wanted to apply for Fall 2011 to US for doctoral studies, and before that I need to prepare well for GRE exam etc.
But, my girlfriend does not want that at all. She hates US for her own reasons and is asking me to move with her as she has been waiting for me. If I go to US, it would easily take 6 years (5 years for PhD).
I just feel sad because I always dreamed to get a good career but I never thought I will get someone like this and will have to change plans like this.
I don't have anything against EU but I think life in US is different, there they have high salaries and its easy to get job (Please correct me if I'm wrong). I will have to learn the language and don't know if I'll end up in cleaning job etc.
Can someone please tell me if its really that great to be in US or its just my illusion? I have a Bachelor degree in Engineering and 2 Masters degrees, I thought it would make life easy there..
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post 25.Jun.2010, 02:14 AM
Post #2
Location: United States
Joined: 30.Jan.2010

I would rather stay with the girl.

Is she hot? Is she loyal? I she in general not a bitch? Does she not make you spend a lot of money on her?

If you've got those things going for you, stay with her in the Europe and find a place there to do your PhD work.

It sounds likely judging from your degrees that you could get a job in the US, but if you don't even know the language and you lose the girl too, my advice is to stay with the girl. Rather than go to the US. Personally speaking.

The US is just fine, and you would probably like it ok, but it is not like it is the magical world of golden-brick roads and gumdrop trees everywhere you look or whatever.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 05:36 AM
Post #3
Joined: 25.Jul.2007

This is a tricky question but remember, doing PhD in the EU won't give you any job opportunities within EU. If you study in the US, you get at least a year or so you can work if you find a job. This options helps if you go anywhere later on with degree and job experience.

On the other hand is this girl in your life. She is equally important. For me what is important than being hot is, is she loyal to you and if you can stand her for rest of your life with what she is now. She won't change, trust me. To live life, you need lot more than love. Frankly, from my point of view, love doesn't feed you and your goal in life is just not to make both ends meet but to live life. Your career is one way to go. This is a catch 22 situation for you.

Frankly, if I were you, I would try my level best to convince the girl, only once I am admitted to the PhD program in the US. Convince her on the point, how pursuing a degree is good for your long term career and how it will benefit both of you in the long run. If she is convinced, fine else I would go ahead myself. I expect my partner to support me in the cause that I legitimately think that its good for both of us. Having issues with the US is plain stupid reason. The people on the street don't make policies but the ones sitting in flashy buildings do, so why hate US, unless she is also a bureaucrat and she interacts with these folks on daily basis (still I don't see the point)

One more suggestion mate, do you really think doing PhD will really help you? Think if you will be over-qualified and hence unsuitable for the job market? If you are from biological science, don't do it, instead take a course that will land you in a job.
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Renfeh Hguh
post 25.Jun.2010, 06:53 AM
Post #4
Location: Not in Sweden
Joined: 1.May.2005

Bitches can come and go, but a PhD stays with you for life.

You your brain and not your dick when making the decision.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 07:08 AM
Post #5
Joined: 26.Jan.2010

Doing a PhD education just to increase your chances for an industry job is not necessarily a good idea. If a large paycheck is important to you and you already have a masters degree then the money you lose during a PhD education (wages+wage increases) is not worth it.

On the other hand, a PhD degree opens up a possible career path in academics, but that doesn't pay very well either.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 07:08 AM
Post #6
Joined: 25.Jun.2010

usa is not good country
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Norrlands Turk
post 25.Jun.2010, 09:12 AM
Post #7
Location: United States
Joined: 10.Dec.2009

Ok. First of all, my situation is pretty similar to yours. My story in short: I am also non-eu, met my blondie before I moved to the states for masters (even though I could have done the masters somewhere in Sweden, save some money and be happy with my gf). I decided to move to Sweden as soon as I complete my masters in the US but I am still here 1.5 year after graduation (long story).

What I would say is: don't do it.

Historically, the only good thing about the US, which is good jobs with high salaries, are long gone.

When you subtract that from the equation, there is nothing attractive about the US.

If your gf really loves you and she is loyal, marry her, get citizenship in three years, find a job in EU (it can't be too difficult when you have 2 masters in engineering). Unless you love teaching, doing PhD doesn't make sense. 5 to 6 years is a long time. Don't do it.

Just my 2 cents.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 10:45 AM
Post #8
Location: Europe
Joined: 26.Mar.2005

As a Engineer I would say unless your going to teach a PhD is pretty much a waste of time. Are your sure you not just trying to be a professional student? You seem to have plenty of qualifications to get off your ass, get a job and give back what the lady has already given you!
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post 25.Jun.2010, 11:17 AM
Post #9
Location: Skåne
Joined: 13.Jun.2009

I have a PhD and I agree with a few of the other posts:

As a Engineer I would say unless your going to teach a PhD is pretty much a waste of time.

Get a job with a good company, work your way up and enjoy life. A PhD is just five years of low pay, long hours and stress. At the end of the PhD you find most of your non-PhD friends are earning more than you. Worse still only about 5% of PhDs get tenure track academic posts, so you will probably find yourself going to the same company that you could have gone to five years earlier.

Then again it is cool to call yourself Dr ...
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post 25.Jun.2010, 01:14 PM
Post #10
Joined: 30.Dec.2009

You have not said how old you are. If you plan to be a professional student, Europe--especially Germany or Sweden--is where you want to be. Some remain students well into their 40s.

Is your GF willing to support you here if you do it her way?
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post 25.Jun.2010, 01:38 PM
Post #11
Joined: 25.Jun.2010

Thanks everyone fr your replies.

You have not said how old you are.
I'll be soon 27 years.
If you plan to be a professional student,
What is 'professional student' ?
I'm interested in PhD as I thought a research career would be more interesting than industrial jobs.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 02:44 PM
Post #12
Joined: 23.Jun.2010

I am from the U.S. and the U.S. has more career opportunities and with higher salaries. Even in this poor economy, we are doing well financially. If you are highly educated and learn English, have good work ethic, you will succeed in the United States.

I have only one 4 year doctorate degree in Accounting. At 48 years old, I am currently earning $175,000.00 per year and the city I live in (Houston, TX) is not costly at all. Now in a city like NY City, $175,000.00 dollars per year does not go very far. My point is, you can establish a very lucrative career here in the United States. If you listen to all of the bad in the media like some of the previous posters obviously have, then you might have a negative view of the U.S. Based on some of the other mundane answers, I don't think that these people have ever lived here. What you do not see in your media is the positives about life in the U.S. Most educated people here live well and we are not all redneck war mongers like the European and other liberal media likes to portray. If you drove you through the neighborhood where I live you would be pleasantly surprised. I even have neighbors and friends from Italy, Switzerland, Norway and England. They all love it here and they are doing well financially.

The choice is yours but the U.S. is not a bad country for someone highly educated like yourself. No, I would not want to be a broke peasant living in the U.S.

I hope this helps.
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Roger O. Thornhill
post 25.Jun.2010, 04:13 PM
Post #13
Joined: 12.Oct.2005

If you have money, one can live anywhere.

Phd doesn't get one much, except perhaps rejected from employment for being overqualified.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 04:57 PM
Post #14
Joined: 16.Jan.2008

You also need to check how much stipend you will get while doing a PhD and the cost of living.

North American PhD positions pay an average stipend of $15,000 USD a year.

You can get more funding through scholarships or TA but that is not a guarantee.
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post 25.Jun.2010, 05:54 PM
Post #15
Location: Stockholm
Joined: 27.Oct.2006

you've been brainwashed by American movies...go to US to see for yourself how's the life there before making your final decision...
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