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My experience "trying" to move to Sweden

Please god, just end me now

Svedallas
post 7.Jun.2018, 01:54 PM
Post #136
Joined: 21.Apr.2016

QUOTE (SmokerT69 @ 7.Jun.2018, 02:42 PM) *
Holy shit, I can not agree more. I didnt notice how bad it was because I tend to hang out with my wife's family and we all joke around and talk nonsense. I actually got th ... (show full quote)


BS.

It is about manners and also being appropriate.

Nothing to do with "miserable". It is called mannerisms, and culture appropriateness.
I am far from miserable but cannot stand when people do not know how to behave.

It is irritating and annoying. Know when to laugh and not to laugh.
Laugh at wrong time, and it is disrespectful.
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nativeswedishengineer
post 7.Jun.2018, 02:06 PM
Post #137
Joined: 7.Nov.2017

QUOTE (Svedallas @ 7.Jun.2018, 02:54 PM) *
BS.It is about manners and also being appropriate.Nothing to do with "miserable". It is called mannerisms, and culture appropriateness.I am far from miserable but ca ... (show full quote)


Could it be the case that the humor of the complainers is incompatible with swedish humor? Because I frequently make small jokes with my coworkers and friend. Allthough swedish humor tends to be a bit more cynical and dry.
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SmokerT69
post 7.Jun.2018, 02:13 PM
Post #138
Location: Gävle
Joined: 28.Feb.2016

QUOTE (Svedallas @ 7.Jun.2018, 02:54 PM) *
BS.It is about manners and also being appropriate.Nothing to do with "miserable". It is called mannerisms, and culture appropriateness.I am far from miserable but ca ... (show full quote)


Lmao... thank you for proving my point you miserable Swede.

So you're saying laughing in the lobby of a heavy metal concert was rude, irritating, disrespectful and annoying? Can you give me a list of places I'm allowed to laugh in Sweden? I would of thought a concert is were people go to relax, unwind and have fun. Apparently not in Sweden löl.
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SmokerT69
post 7.Jun.2018, 02:17 PM
Post #139
Location: Gävle
Joined: 28.Feb.2016

QUOTE (nativeswedishengineer @ 7.Jun.2018, 03:06 PM) *
Could it be the case that the humor of the complainers is incompatible with swedish humor? Because I frequently make small jokes with my coworkers and friend. Allthough swedis ... (show full quote)


There was no one complaining. We were waiting in the lobby for my brother in laws friend who was running late. The security guard was across the hall and when he saw me laughing and then my brother in law start laughing, he came over and told us to leave. He could not possibly have heard the joke as the place was pretty full and everyone was talking.
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Svedallas
post 7.Jun.2018, 02:25 PM
Post #140
Joined: 21.Apr.2016

QUOTE (SmokerT69 @ 7.Jun.2018, 03:13 PM) *
Lmao... thank you for proving my point you miserable Swede.So you're saying laughing in the lobby of a heavy metal concert was rude, irritating, disrespectful and annoying ... (show full quote)


Anywhere.

It is also called social manners and when appropriate.
You're the one with an awkward encounter because of lack thereof...

Don't come here complaining...
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SmokerT69
post 7.Jun.2018, 03:05 PM
Post #141
Location: Gävle
Joined: 28.Feb.2016

QUOTE (Svedallas @ 7.Jun.2018, 03:25 PM) *
Anywhere. . It is also called social manners and when appropriate.. You're the one with an awkward encounter because of lack thereof.... Don't come here complaining...


Again, I fail to see how laughing in a public place, in this instance, the lobby of a heavy metal concert where people go to talk and use the bathroom is considered a lack of manners. If anything you're fully proving the point of the orignal post and myself. Swedes are miserable and the fact you think laughing goes against the social norm only cements the fact of how backwards and miserable Swedish society is as a whole.

"Don't come here complaining"

Kek... maybe you missed the entire point of this thread. It's me complaining about how insane it is to migrate to Sweden despite being married to a Swed and having Swedish children. The fact I've been here for over a year and will most likely have to wait another year just to get a piece of paper saying that I can indeed live here is insane.
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Svedallas
post 7.Jun.2018, 04:19 PM
Post #142
Joined: 21.Apr.2016

QUOTE (SmokerT69 @ 7.Jun.2018, 04:05 PM) *
Again, I fail to see how laughing in a public place, in this instance, the lobby of a heavy metal concert where people go to talk and use the bathroom is considered a lack of ... (show full quote)



For someone who has only been here a year, I would give it at least minimum 6 years to understand social protocol...

Yes. Being married and having Swedish children, you should have automatic rights.
But our politics is a joke.

9000 afghans will sadly and probably get their visa to stay before you do.
A fucked up migration system we have here...
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SmokerT69
post 7.Jun.2018, 04:21 PM
Post #143
Location: Gävle
Joined: 28.Feb.2016

Was just talking to my wife about the absurdity of this conversation.

She told me to say "Jantelagen". She said this best describes how Swedes are. And that if I want to fit in I have to "become a lagom Swede" and avoid any conflict and don't show interest in anything. Lol
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Svedallas
post 7.Jun.2018, 04:44 PM
Post #144
Joined: 21.Apr.2016

QUOTE (SmokerT69 @ 7.Jun.2018, 05:21 PM) *
Was just talking to my wife about the absurdity of this conversation. She told me to say "Jantelagen". She said this best describes how Swedes are. And that if I wan ... (show full quote)


Your wife was right!

You have to be a lagom "Swede" for the most part.

However, you need to find Swedish friends who do not take lagom so seriously. There are plenty...

Sweden is not that bad as people make it out to be. It is about finding the right sort of people who can give you balance. If not, yes, you are right, there will be a lot of conflict, especially socially, and you will develop an unnecessary complex about yourself.
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Gjeebes
post 7.Jun.2018, 05:20 PM
Post #145
Joined: 20.Feb.2012

Wow, Sveddy reveals all, yet no real surprises.

You engage in "discussion" where you claim to be the Meatballian authority of "laughing matters", whilst being completely unaware that the whole time, "you" are directly the focus of all laughing matters related to this thread.

In fact, I'm laughing at your utterly miserable, backwards outlook, right now.

The Swedish model: kill the laughter, together.
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Svedallas
post 7.Jun.2018, 05:41 PM
Post #146
Joined: 21.Apr.2016

QUOTE (Gjeebes @ 7.Jun.2018, 06:20 PM) *
Wow, Sveddy reveals all, yet no real surprises.You engage in "discussion" where you claim to be the Meatballian authority of "laughing matters", whilst bei ... (show full quote)


HeebeeJeebees...
Not happy in Germany too??
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Gjeebes
post 7.Jun.2018, 06:51 PM
Post #147
Joined: 20.Feb.2012

Quite happy in Germany, thanks for your "concern".

Still miserable living your waste of a life, in Meatballia?

Woof.
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Saywhatwhat
post 7.Jun.2018, 07:39 PM
Post #148
Joined: 15.Feb.2018

In defense of svedallas, don't know why really, they have been a much more supportive and level headed presence in this forum as of late

They came to sweden iN a different time and social climate so their opinions on some things may be irrelevant or outdated, and on the flip, their time in Sweden brings a valid, possibly more Swedish, point of view.

Just because they are happy in Sweden doesn't mean they support all the nonsense, political, cultural, or social.

Someone can live in any country, be happy and proud of the country, and still think the culture, or politics, or the whole country for that matter, is a joke. Take the US fir instance, so much ridiculous bullshit there, but many are still proud and support and defend it.

Doesnt mean they have their head in the sand.
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Gamla Hälsingebock
post 7.Jun.2018, 08:09 PM
Post #149
Joined: 21.Dec.2006

What is missing here and seems to be always missing in these discussions is that Swedes are being judged by cultures that are foreign to Sweden!!!

When people move to Sweden they bring their own upbringing and culture to their new home...And guess what...it does not work as expected!!!

You cannot take your lifestyle and judge others who are not familiar with it...

This ongoing problem is called culture shock!!!

So remember when you say bad things about Swedes you are using standards that are just as foreign to them as theirs are to you

Be nice rolleyes.gif
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Saywhatwhat
post 7.Jun.2018, 09:02 PM
Post #150
Joined: 15.Feb.2018

Smoker, what has your Swedish partner said about the situation you are now in? Do they understand that Sweden probably isn't the place for your family if it is keeping you down/ hoLding you back/ not letting you live?

Sorry if you've answered this previously. I hope your partner understands the mistake of moving to sweden when you dont get the chance to have an opportunity at a fulfilling life. Are they open to moving back to Bermuda, beautiful island by the way, or England?

Best of luck to you!
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